On Adoption

My apologies for the lack of posting around here. I just really couldn't put my thoughts into words. Well, I probably still can't, but I'll try.

The adoption is moving along. We are communicating with the birth mother regularly and are planning on meeting her this Friday. Everything on our side of things has been completed for the home-study so we are just waiting to hear that our agency completed their side.

This process has moved very quickly. Faster than I thought it would when we started out. But, this is good for us because we tend to stall on projects that take too long and lose steam. So, the good Lord knows exactly what we need and when we need it.

May and June are typically very busy for us with Mother's Day, DH's birthday, E's birthday and our anniversary. Lots going on every weekend and then there is just the every day kind of stuff. We have the nursery set back up and I just need to get a few small things together for the baby's arrival. We think that delivery date will be the first week in September. It is coming up quickly!

But the one part of adoption that I can't stop thinking and praying about is that this baby is coming into our lives due to the birth mother's sorrowful situation. It is more sorrowful than words that she is placing her baby for adoption and that our joy will come from this. Our journey to parenthood has been so filled with blood, sweat and many, many tears and this situation is no different. It is beautiful that we get to share our sorrow with another woman, the biological mother of our baby. I have been leaning on the Blessed Mother because She really knows sorrow, uncertainty, trust, and complete charity. She knows. Mary Mother of Sorrows, Pray for Us.

E is 4!

We celebrated the Feast of St. Anthony of Padua at the Shrine in Ellicot City, MD. Beautiful Mass, Procession, Adoration, Rosary in the Grotto, and BBQ! 

God's Mercy

Reflecting on my second miscarriage, I can't help but believe that this is God' Mercy for me.

Let me explain. Throughout my short life I have encountered many sufferings. But, looking back, I realize that with each suffering, the Lord is calling me back to Him. He knows me. He knows that I tend to wander when comfortable. I get quite lazy. I slow down my prayer. I got to daily mass less. But, when suffering and in pain, I call out to Him. I pray more. I seek Him more.

Through suffering, I realize that I am not God. I do not know all. I cannot do all. Therefore, suffering is really God's Mercy for me. Just like the Cross. He could have stopped the suffering. But, He allowed it. Jesus modeled perfect obedience and Mary also modeled perfect emotional suffering to model how we should live. It is such a hard, hard way of life, but one that leads to peace. (And hopefully Heaven!).

After this second miscarriage, I have a strange peace. I don't get those twinges of jealousy of friends that are still pregnant. Or those that pregnant so easily. Now, I did cry about not being able to share this special time with my friends when I realized that I was miscarrying, but since then, no anger or jealousy. This is only by the Grace of God. And His Blessed Mother.

She Sat at the Foot of the Cross

This morning while praying the Chaplet of the Seven Sorrows of Mary I realized something new to me. In the Sixth Sorrow, Mary held Jesus after He was taken down from the Cross, Mary held Him and sat at the foot of the cross.

Ouch.

She sat there. She didn't get up and run from it. She didn't blame anyone for Her Son's death. She sat there and was sorrowful.

I have so much to learn from Mary. So many times in the midst of suffering, I want to run away, blame someone else, or just be angry. But Mary shows us a better way. A way of peace. Of surrendering. Acceptance.

I have a far, far way to go.

Mary, Mother of Sorrows, pray for us.